The Portland Press Herald reports that Maine is getting a $30,000 grant to help install 100 tsunami signs.
Thank God because Maine was hit with a tsunami just last … um … er … oh, that’s right: never.
Now these aren’t warning devices or anything that could possibly be even remotely useful. No, these are just signs that identify evacuation routes should a tsunami actually strike.
Now let’s see how that would work.
You’re relaxing in the sun while stretched out on a blanket at Old Orchard Beach. (Yes, I know, if you live in Maine, you don’t go to Old Orchard, but play along with me here.)
Someone starts screaming and you look up to see a huge wave a couple of hundred yards out rushing to shore. You need to get out of there, but because you’re a tourist (the person most likely to benefit by the signs according to the emergency planners), you don’t know which way to go. Rushing toward the wave is probably a bad idea, but where exactly do you go to get away from that evil tsunami?
Then you remember that emergency evacuation route sign you saw once and quickly look around to see if you can spot it. You see a blue sign on the other side of the street and rush toward it so that you’ll know where to go.
You take a couple of steps and are hit by what feels like a locomotive. You realize it’s the tsunami and as you’re pulled tumbling underwater, you’re propelled quickly across the street. In a twist of fate, you narrowly miss the very sign you were looking for. As your breath begins to give out, you realize that you’re tumbling in the precise direction of the arrow on the sign. As your vision narrows to a pin point, you silently (remember, you’re underwater) give thanks to the state of Maine for erecting those helpful tsunami signs.
This was timely………because you can get 50% off an Old Orchard Beach getaway at themainedeal.com! (But you have to act fast…)
Posted by: Corrie | May 11, 2020 at 12:04 PM